Monday, May 4, 2009

Lesson Learned

It's amazing...this thing they call the human spirit...

It never fails to amuse me how,amidst all the troubles one could ever have,one wriggles out with sheer indifference...for paying heed to something utterly insignificant and untrue would only fuel people's suspicions.
Who has the right to gossip about anybody? I never realized when I used to be scolded by my parents or others. With each passing day,however,I'm realizing that every human has his or her own worth. And no one's having to tell me these things. I realize,through my obsessive (and sometimes tending towards insanity) contemplation.
There are no people in this world who wish to discuss things that bother them. They only bring back the worst memories and stir in them that weird feeling (forgive my inadequate vocabulary) of something that's like the broth that the witches stir. No...you can do anything to do away with unpleasantness.
With every passing day,I'm also learning how important it is to never trust anyone. Yes,you read that right. There's a certain part of you that always warns you..tells you you shouldn't do something. That's your intuition. Being the impulsive wreck that I am,I always treat my intuition as stupid and have always been shown down by it. Never ever shall I defy it again,I hear myself screaming. Am I listening to myself?
But I'm learning. I'm learning the importance of all my contemplation. It all gets buried somewhere at the back of my mind,and I worry how I'll ever put all my thoughts into practice. What if I fail? But it all happens unconsciously. I never have to think twice when the time comes. I start behaving and react in the the way I always wanted to. I had conditioned myself for it. All the worry has been put to good use.

But that's about me. What about all that's been happening around me? I only think of how I'll cope with it. But what about "it"?? It's so unfathomable...how jobless people are and how they derive entertainment from people's lives and things that are non-existent. There has to be a topic for coffee-table (you'll be surprised how unfitting and unnnecessarily glamourous that adjective is for the table that exists in reality) conversation...so who's our scape-goat for today?

I never pay heed. I never will either. It's just that my life is so much more meaningful than so many others'. People will never realize,and I guess there's enough complacency in feeling that. For,if everyone loved,if everyone cared,if everyone was the same and compassion really ruled,where would incentives and the "ass-kicking" spirit come from? I wouldn't survive. And here, again out of a failure of my vocabulary,I shall call myself,and many others like me,a survivor!

Now the deed is done. Here I'm relieving myself from all my thoughts,beacuse somehow,once I've blogged, I never think about these things. Thank you creators of Blogspot! :D