Sunday, November 23, 2008

A night in the life of a Band in Kolkata

It starts right at the beginning of the talks....
"Remember you're playing for people who don't understand too much of english music(whatever does the term "english music" mean for God's sake?). Play five or six fast numbers. Fast ones maney bojho toh? Maney audience ko naach karne padega. Samjha? We don't want those noisy songs. Aunties and uncles don't like it."

There they go...walking out of his office. So much for the grand dreams of a rock band in Kolkata.They enjoy playing Deep Purple,but they're audience doesnt know anything beyond Smoke on the Water and that's noise to auntys' ears. So much for the dreams of long hair flying in the wind...so much for walking on the stage with girls trying their hardest to grab you...happy they are...even if they get to touch your dirty dusty shoes. Perhaps dreams are only soap bubbles...

And so they arrive. Fatso uncle asked them to be 2 hours before "show time". Sound check is done....but where are the people? It's past the time they had promised to start the show at!
Damn...
we keep on waiting
and waiting
and waiting
and....
VOILA!
a soul comes floating from somewhere.
and then they start coming in....
The place is teeming with people.
They start with a rocking number. The Beatles. Aunties and uncles will know this one!
Waah! what do you know...uncles and aunties staring at you blankly!
"Look at the lead vocalist! He's so cute nah?"
"Oma ki shweet dekhte! Dekh byapok shirt pode achhe nah?"
"Ei aajke dinner e ki achhe re? Menu ta dekhte bhule gechhilam"
"Hey! Are these the diamonds you were mentioning to me the other day?"

There is perhaps only one girl,perhaps in college,who sits and listens to these guys intently. Clapping and shouting when she finds them doing a particularly cool riff or an improvisation. But she's just one.

The lead vocalist has had enough. Calling all the kiddies onto the dance floor or the stage won't be such a bad idea really. So he does it. But what follows is more than a mayhem he can handle.
After the "fast" number is over,he tries a John Mayer. Gravity: The track is particularly difficult,slow and beautiful. He dedicates it to the ladies...
Whoa! What do I see? A kid just ran across the stage,waving. And then another,and another and another!
Tch tch. Kids!!!!!!!
By then Gravity had gone down into the dumps...gravity did act upon it. Silence. An infrasonic applause maybe.
Hmm. Change in plans. "Let's try La Bamba!!"
That does the trick. The LV's convinced the audience likes foot tapping numbers. The dance floor is filled with teenagers and a few aunties dancing like they would do for all Rabindrasangeet songs. But who the hell cares?
The next number was 'sindbad the sailor' from the movie Rock On!! That was clearly a hit. This isn't too bad: Our audience is pleased with hindi numbers,and so are we beacuse the songs are good. God Bless Shankar,Ehsaan and Loy!
And then the freak moment.

A few drunk uncles and a few aunties shout ,"we want pappu can't dance saala!"

So much for a rock band....

4 comments:

Rene Lacoste said...

So much for a rock band:P. I remember hazily a couple of band performances from my childhood days. All of us'd demanded popular Hindi songs then :D. Anyway, I was too much of a noob at music back then. Adi would love to talk about it ;)

Legitimate FreaK! said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Legitimate FreaK! said...

i'm so glad i never played at a party gig; or you'd find me get off the stage and burn down the place with that kind of crowd in it ! lol

well, i however, feel sad for fellow musicians/bands in our country.. who , even with so much talent and effort can hardly find an audience who would understand music as music, and not just a 'track' for shaking their big asses to the 'bass' sound of it!

so much for 'pleasure' and 'socializing' ! mera bharat mahaan!

better the old days when there would be social gatherings ( even with hard drinks ) , but, people sit down., calm, composed, and listen to few great artists belting out the best of ghazals , thumris and the likes.. each of 'em followed by 'wah waahs' and a loud applause..

truth is..

India's changing for sure..
but are we really changing for good ?!

The Dark Side Of The Moon said...

I smell a whiff of "Rock On" here..!Hmmm ;-)

And woman,there is "english music"..."auntys' and uncles" love bragging that their kid only listens to "firangi music"....oh yes....throw in some misogynistic rap,senseless hip-hop...and gyrating popstars...!Take a pick ;P